How and where to find other lesbians for dating

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If you’ve just come marching out of the closet, working out how and where to find other lesbians can feel like suddenly finding yourself in another country. You’ll likely be nervous, as your newly-embraced identity can feel fragile to begin with.

However, the lesbian community, although not necessarily ‘in your face’ is a strong one.  With a few pointers up your sleeve, you’ll find meeting other lesbians stress-free and rewarding.

Find the perfect dating site

First things first. Find the best dating site that caters to your needs. Thankfully, we’ve done all the hard work for you by finding the best LGBT dating sites in the UK.

Most Popular Choice
9.9
eharmony
  • #1 trusted dating app in the UK
  • For serious, long-term relationships
  • Free registration
9.6
Flirthits
  • Perfect for: People looking to flirt and starts things off in a fun way
  • Find someone in your neighbourhood
  • Chat with like-minded singles straight away
9.4
SingleSlavic
  • The place to find like-minded people who are looking for meaningful relationships
  • Great search function
  • Immediate support from professional team
9.1
Ulla
  • Ignite romance right in your vicinity
  • Enjoy exact matching thanks to accurate filters;
  • And explore many more benefits that will help you find love!
8.7
Pukbo
  • Welcome Offer for new members
  • Unique VIP Content for premium members
  • Maximum payment security (Google Pay, Apple Pay etc.)
8.4
DateMyAge
  • Free sign-up!
  • Easy-to-use interface, optimized for all devices.
  • 100% match guarantee.
  • Privacy protected in a discreet environment.
  • Possible great matches,
7.9
GoChatty
  • Help people to find love
  • Bring emotions
  • Make new friends
7.7
FlirtsNearby

 

  • Tailored matching algorithm + localized connections 

  • Privacy with advanced security features 

  • Local events and activities 

7.3
AskMe4Date
  • local dating
  • chat rooms
  • available for mobile too
6.8
MatureFlirts
  • Thousands of mature singles looking for love, romance, and friendship
  • Advanced features like identity verification, profile screening, and anti-scam protection
  • Explore your preferences with search filters, chat rooms, and compatibility tests 
6.5
My Mature Flirt

 

  • Possibility to join local events for exciting encounters with other singles in the UK

  • Cutting-edge algorithms that will create personalized connections 

  • Top priority for safety, with mystery and excitement still in the air 

6.3
Only-Flirts
  • Easy and convenient interface
  • Perfect for casual dating & hookups
  • Plenty of members for you to have fun with
6.2
Mingl3
  • Best for anonymous and discreet encounters
  • Free registration and free membership
  • Chat with thousands of attractive singles
6.0
CupiDates
  • Large database of Asian and European singles in the UK
  • Full control of your profile to set your desired privacy settings
  • Attend virtual events to meet even more members
5.8
MyFunDate
 
  • Free, fast and easy registration
  • Real girls from 180 countries
  • Highly engaged and active community
5.6
Ashley Madison
  • Best for open-minded looking for “no strings attached” fun
  • Free membership
  • 54 million users 
5.5
DateYourGirl
  • Meet attractive Asian, European, & Latino singles
  • Quick and free signup 
  • Casual or serious online dating

While the gay male community often takes the spotlight, the lesbian community is just as strong and supportive. Once you dip your toe in the waters, you’ll quickly find friends and people who have experienced similar situations and circumstances.

Finding and connecting with these women can feel like an impossible task.

Being new to the lesbian lifestyle can feel as though you’re at a disadvantage. While there are plenty of lesbian groups out there, taking that first step can take an awful lot of courage. To take the edge off joining a lesbian sports’ group or book club, the Internet can quickly become your best friend.

Joining lesbian dating sites is a great way to connect with other women before throwing yourself in the deep-end and meeting face-to-face. With the cloak of online anonymity at your disposal, you can interact with other women, at your own pace.

lesbian couple cuddling

Where to meet other lesbians

If you prefer the real world to its virtual alternative, there are plenty of options available. The first and most obvious is to hunt out lesbian bars in your area. If you’re new to the lesbian world, lesbian bars can be a great way to make a start and meet new people.

Generally, lesbian bars are patronised by women who have probably been in your shoes and will welcome you into the community, without too much fuss. You may also bump into women who are in the same situation as you and are just as nervous about making connections. Either way, you’re likely to find someone to talk to, who has something valuable to offer.

Some other ideas for places to meet include:

  • Concerts
  • Volunteer for activist meetings or charity events
  • Feminist book clubs

Need inspiration for your lesbian date? Check out our LGBTQ+ movies list to find your pick for a romantic night.

Lesbian groups are another easy way to connect with gay or bisexual women. A quick Google of local, lesbian groups will tell you what’s in your area. However, don’t let the word ‘lesbian’ be your guiding light; consider your interests first. If you’re a sports’ nut or have are a passion for the arts, consider those factors first.

One of the main benefits of finding a lesbian group is that your sexuality takes second fiddle to your interest. If you go to a lesbian sculpture class, it’s a given that you’re gay and your sexual identity isn’t in question. Combining a passion for meeting people from the lesbian community is a superb way of easing yourself into the lesbian dating world.

Wondering what you’re getting yourself into? Here are some common issues and challenges in lesbian dating.

Meeting lesbians online

Meeting lesbians online is possibly the best way to find your feet if you’re new to the community. There are plenty of lesbian dating apps and websites, which allow you to engage with other women at the pace that’s best for you. If you’re considering lesbian dating sites as your entry-point into the world of dating other women, there are a few things it’s worth being aware of:

  • Do some research. Not all dating websites are created equally, so checking out user reviews can help you decide if you’re barking up the right tree.

  • Join as a free member. While Basic Membership can be limited and frustrating, it can also give you a good idea about the type of people who use the site and what they’re looking for.

  • Cast your net wide. Don’t put all your eggs in one basket. Whether you join a website as a free member or opt for a paid subscription, joining a few lesbian dating sites will increase your chances of finding the type of lesbian relationship you’re looking for.

  • Sell yourself. Even if the idea of promoting yourself is alien to you, it’s time to think about what you’ve got to offer. Invest some time in your user profile and be sure that your profile pictures show you in your best light without showing off.
  • Select the type of dating app you want to use, there is a lot of variety and you can also use bisexual dating sites.

Don’t neglect your friends

Whether you’ve been out and proud for years or this is all new to you, your friends are likely to be your best resource. The people who know you best will be able to give you unbiased opinions about how to get into lesbian dating.

While might require some frank conversations, discovering how your friends see you and their suggestions on your ideal partner can be incredibly helpful. Their insight may well unearth some things you’ve never thought of and inform your journey towards rewarding and positive lesbian dating.